Red Roses
by sugarcult
Summary: Septimus thought he knew, he thought wrong and now he'll pay the price. Random story I felt the need to write down. Chapter 5 is up.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi this is my first fic so please be nice and review! Random idea that I had and felt the need to write down the characters aren't really right at the beginning but it does go somewhere and then it works! R&R plz!**

**Wishful Thinking**

"Beat you" gasped Septimus, almost collapsing on the floor as he said it.

"Guess you did" replied Marcia

Septimus had Marcia pinned to the floor, held there by invisible restraints. Septimus liked it when he beat Marcia at things, but mainly he liked being better than everyone else.

"Are you going to let me up?" asked Marcia impatiently, "Or am I just going to have to lie here?"

"Sorry" said Septimus and he released the barriers.

"Well, I think you're going to pass the practical", said Marcia, getting to her feet, "but your still there's room for improvement, you're defence is still a bit weak."

"What", said Septimus outraged, "I beat you! That means I'm better than you! You can't tell me what to do, when I'm better than you! You can't teach me because I've beaten you!"

"Septimus", Marcia said calmly, "I would have expected better from you, you may be better than me at this but I am still your teacher and I shall continue to instruct you until the end of your apprenteship"

Septimus immediately felt ashamed, "I'm sorry, I just got.... carried away and I was pleased that I beat you and.... I'm sorry"

"That's quite alright, now as I was saying your defence is a bit weak. Shall we practice again"

"Alright" said Septimus.

They began again. Septimus threw a Stun Curse at Marcia but she deflected it, they began to circle each other throwing curses sometimes. Until Septimus took his chance when Marcia's defences were down and threw a flash of light ahead of him and dived at her pinning her arms to her sides. Marcia sent an electric current threw her skin and Septimus immediately let her go. But before she had time to get to her feet he pulled her arms behind her, and using his size advantage trapped her in an arm lock.

"Ouch" exclaimed Marcia, "this is supposed to be Magykal defence not bloody martial arts!"

"Ha" laughed Septimus, "your still cross because I'm taller than you now!"

Septimus had grown dramatically in a short space of time and now, at the age of 15 he was 6 foot 2 and a lot taller than Marcia. He was also a lot bigger than her, Marcia was small framed and thin and Septimus was muscular. He liked to press this advantage whenever he could.

"Take a break" Marcia said

"Are you tired?" taunted Septimus

"No", said Marcia irritably "I need a cigarette"

"Hmm" was all Septimus managed to reply. Septimus had learned two years ago that Marcia was a habitual smoker. He had also found out that the reason he had only found out two years ago was because while he was still young Marcia had tried not to smoke around him as he was, quote her 'too young to smoke' and she didn't want him near the stuff. Now Septimus was older he also understood a variety of other things that he hadn't before, like about all the gentlemen that Marcia had claimed were business men that were up in her rooms were doing. And it was a little more than talking, some of them were indeed businessmen that Marcia had met whilst at a committee meeting or at a conference but they defiantly were not chatting about business, well at least not about the business that they should have been discussing.

Marcia had once told him not to mix business with pleasure, what a hypocrite he thought to himself. Sometimes he hoped she would act more responsibly. But that was only wishful thinking.

**This does go somewhere, but kinda weird intro sort of thing**

**Plz review and tell me what you think! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi! Update time! Thx to Camilla Richard for reviewing! **

**Discovery**

Jenna walked leisurely through the Palace gardens, admiring the flowers along the neatly trimmed paths. Jenna loved taking long walks through the garden; it always made her feel peaceful and happy. In her left hand she held a small plant and in her right a spade. She had rescued the flower from a hole in the wall in which it had been growing, it was only small and Sarah had told her it was a wild flower. It was delicate and a light buttery yellow. When Jenna had found a nice place for her plant she began to dig.

As she dug into the soil she found that her spade came into contact with something hard. She moved her fingers down to touch it, it was cold. Forgetting the plant for a minute she began to scrape away at the soil around it until it came loose. It was a little box. She held it in her hands for a moment, it was quite heavy.

She placed the plant in the hole and covered the roots and then redirected her attention to the box in her hands. Engraved on the side was a small red rose. There was a hole in the centre of it as if a jewel was supposed to fit into it. She started off towards the Palace again; she decided that there was only one way to find out what this was and probably only one person who could tell her.

********************************************************************************

Septimus was in his room. Marcellus had given him an interesting book entitled 'Alchemie through Time'. It was something that he didn't think Marcia would approve of and thought that it would be best to read it in the confines of his room. He was so completely engrossed in his book that he barely noticed when there was a knock at his door.

"Sep", came a tentative voice from outside, "You in there?"

"Jen", Septimus sighed with relief that it wasn't Marcia, "course you can come in"

As Jenna had the password to the Wizard Tower she had developed an annoying habit of just coming up to his room whenever she felt like it.

"Hey Sep, how are you?" asked Jenna

"I'm good, I was scared you were Marcia", replied Septimus

"Why were you scared I was Marcia?"

In answer Septimus waved the book Marcellus had given him under her nose.

"Ha", laughed Jenna, "I take it you're not supposed to be reading that"

"Yep, it's Alchemie and with Marcia... well you know how she is about it"

"Well aren't you going to ask me what I'm holding?" asked Jenna playfully

"Sorry" Septimus grinned, he then put on a posh accent and said, "May I please enquire about what it is that you are holding"

"Much better", said Jenna "It's something that I found in the Palace garden and I was hoping you could tell me what it was"

Septimus took the box and examined it closely.

"Dunno Jen" stated Septimus, "If you want something identifying then take it to the Manuscriptorium"

"Oh", said Jenna unable to mask her disappointment

"But maybe Marcia knows what it is", said Septimus hurriedly, he hated it when Jenna was disappointed.

"Could you ask her?" replied Jenna hopefully

"Why don't you? You are the Princess. You'll have to get used to demanding things and bossing people around", Septimus teased

"I'll make a great Queen, just you see" retorted Jenna, "Maybe I'll banish you from the Castle"

"Ha I'd like to see you try!" laughed Septimus

Jenna tried and failed to keep a straight face, soon they both succumbed to fits of laughter.

"I'll come back later when Marcia's here, shall I?" asked Jenna after they had stopped laughing.

"I guess", said Septimus "but you could wait, I don't see you much these days"

"I know" said Jenna sadly, "but we both have our responsibilities and well, duty calls"

"You got that from a book didn't you" said Septimus accusingly

"I am capable of independent thought you know" replied Jenna, "there's no need to sound so surprised when I say something intelligent"

"Hmm" said Septimus

"What" asked Jenna

"I was just thinking that maybe that's one of those Enchanted Dome thingys" replied Septimus

"But it's a square" said Jenna

"Not necessarily"

"Stop speaking in riddles"

"Well just because something looks square doesn't mean that it is"

Just then the sound of a door closing pulled them out of their reprieve.

"Septimus?" Marcia called tentatively up the stairs

"Hey Marcia" replied Septimus, "Up here"

They heard Marcia's footsteps come up the stairs.

"Septimus, I've bought you the crushed Pandan leaf and Ajwain that you asked for" said Marcia, waving small containers full of herbs, "I don't see why you need them. Oh, hello Jenna"

"Hi Marcia" replied Jenna

Septimus nudged her encouragingly.

"Um..." Jenna began, "I was wondering if you knew what this is"

She showed Marcia the 'Enchanted Dome thingy' (as named by Septimus).

"Hmmm..." said Marcia, taking it from Jenna and looking at it, "It's some sort of Enchanted Dome, interesting, do you mind if I ask where you found this?"

"In the Palace gardens" responded Jenna

"Weird, I don't suppose you found this buried somewhere"

Septimus thought Marcia was joking, why would Jenna be digging in the Palace garden.

"Yes, as a matter of fact I did" said Jenna

"Well, looks like a replica of the 'Antiga Misticismo Rosa'" said Marcia

"The what?" asked Jenna

"Ancient Mystic Rose, you can keep it if you want, it's not going to do anything interesting" stated Marcia

Jenna put the box back in her bag and looked round at Septimus who was staring aimlessly out of a window.

"Septimus", said Marcia sternly

"What?" asked Septimus, "Oh sorry, just day dreaming"

"Why don't you have the afternoon off, you look tired", said Marcia

"Thanks, but I'm ok. I don't need time off" replied Septimus

"I know you don't but I thought you might like to have some anyway"

"Alright"

Maybe an afternoon off wouldn't be such a bad thing. He could spend more time with Jenna and his parents or go and see Nicko, or he could see Beetle, he felt like he hadn't see Beetle in ages. That would be nice.

"Now", said Marcia, "I have guests coming round later and I would rather you weren't left alone with them for any amount of time so if you do come back later, as you could spend a night at the Palace of Jenna has no objections, then you must be careful to stay near me"

"Alright", agreed Septimus, he was used to the strange people that Marcia brought back here but he was pretty sure that none would be as weird as the man that drank practically drank a whole bottle of whisky got up on a table and started singing. No one could be stranger than that.

"Bye", said Marcia, and headed out of the room

Septimus and Jenna set off to find Beetle.

**Yay! **

**Thank-You for reading**

**I'm planning to do a longer chapter when I find the time!**

**Bella**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 is here! This took a long time to write! This chapter takes you to the edge of random and back, and includes drunk people.... so enjoy!**

**Under the Influence of Alcohol**

It was 10:00am.

Septimus and Jenna were in the Palace having breakfast with Sarah and Silas; they were chatting and enjoying the good food prepared by the Palace cook. They had gone to see Beetle last night but Mrs Beetle had told them that he had gone to collect some linen from the port and wouldn't be back until Wednesday, Jenna and Septimus had been disappointed not to see him but spent plenty of time in the Palace gardens discussing what the Rose Box had been for. Silas and Sarah were thoroughly pleased to see Septimus and had bombarded him with relentless questions until he had finally headed off to bed. Silas had decided that he would go over to the Wizard Tower to pick up some books from the Library on how to Seal a room against specific things, in this case a moody but brilliant Counter feet colony that he had found in the attic. Septimus wasn't sure what Marcia would have to say about it but he was sure that she would say a lot. Oh well he thought, as least he'd get to spend more time with his dad.

On the other side of the castle, up on the top floor of the Wizard Tower, Marcia wasn't having such a good morning. She had awoken to find herself lying on the kitchen floor, in her underwear. Her head hurt, her neck hurt, her arms hurt, her legs hurt, everything else hurt and she felt quite sick. She reckoned she must have passed out about four, but what she had been doing before then she had no clue. She couldn't remember anything, least of all what she had done to merit this much of a hangover. Slowly, very slowly she began to sit up. Across the room a slightly muffled whimpering noise startled her and she spun her head round to see the cause of the noise. Big mistake. Pain ripped through her head and she collapsed on the floor.

"Aaarrgghh" she moaned

Maybe if I just sit here and sleep it off all will be fine. All will not be fine.

"Neeewwwhhh" she was surprised by the sound, she had meant to say 'no' but clearly had lost the power of speech.

Suddenly she became aware of a searing pain in her tongue, that she had been too preoccupied before to notice. She also rapidly became aware of the fact that there seemed to be something _in_ her tongue. She cautiously moved a hand up to her face, she had a serious case of double vision but ignoring this she prodded the thing in her tongue with her finger.

"Aaarrgghh"

That had hurt. But she had also discovered that there seemed to be an earring through her tongue, just a stud but man did it hurt.

"Wvhet thd hwel"

The thing earring in her tongue seemed to be impairing her speech. It also hurt. A lot. Marcia decided that she probably should get dressed but the prospect of moving seemed incredibly uninviting. After a few minutes she decided that she had no choice but to get up. She sighed, looks like it's gonna be one of those kinda days. She heaved herself off the floor and slowly began her way to the bathroom. She passed three other unconscious people, all in various states of undress but paid them little attention. She had her own problems to deal with. When she finally got to the bathroom she looked in the mirror.

"Wvhet thd bwloodvy hwel"

She looked an absolute mess. Her hair was a mess and sticking up in ridiculous angles. Her make-up was smudged down her face on one side and she had some sort of fluorescent blue paint on her neck. She stuck out her tongue. Her assumption had been correct, it was pierced. She moaned and turned on the shower. When it was warm she undressed and climbed in. Her mind was racing now she could think better. Who were the people on the floor in her apartment? What had happened to the rest of the guests? How drunk had she been last night? How many people had seen her like that? Where had she got her tongue pierced? Were the people at the piercing shop shocked to see the ExtraOrdinary Wizard get her tongue pierced? Were they shocked to see her drunk? Why couldn't she remember anything? What was the blue paint from? Why had she been on the kitchen floor in her underwear? Where were her clothes? Where was Septimus? When would he be back? Did she have enough time to tidy the place up re-master the art of speech and pretend that nothing weird had happened last night? She climbed out of the shower and grabbed a towel from the rack and wrapped it round herself. As she headed downstairs again she found that the people who she had seen lying on the floor on her way to the bathroom where still there. She walked over to the man wearing the most and prodded him in the back.

"Getoff" he mumbled

Marcia prodded him again. This time the man rolled over and looked up at her, it was Anthony Van Derighn; he had been a one of Marcia's guests. She ignored the fact that her was looking up her towel and said with the sternest voice she could manage with a lisp:

"Thyou hawe fwive minwetes tho gwet thour stwuf thand gwet thout owf hwere"

"What?" he said still looking up her towel

Marcia groaned she couldn't go round talking like this, she couldn't say something that everyone who gets drunk can recognise in most languages 'you have five minutes to get out of here' this, she decided, was a disaster. She left the man on the floor and walked over to another man wearing, to her disgust absolutely nothing, there he was lying on his back flashing her pretty much everything. She sighed grabbing a cushion and throwing it at him.

"Bleargh" he mumbled when it hit, and he slowly opened his eyes. The expression on Marcia's face was enough to make him hurry to his feet grab his clothes from behind the sofa and rush for the door. The other naked man saw this display and quickly followed suit. Now this just left the pervert that looked up her towel. She marched over to him and was about to tell him to get up and get out, when he suddenly leaped to his feet.

"Before you say anything I just wanna ask if I can use your shower " he said

"Wthil tho lweave ith I leth thyou?" Marcia asked completely aware of how silly she sounded

"Maybe" he said, "but I don't mind staying"

He reached over and tried to grab her but she leaped away.

"Bit friskier last night" he remarked, "but then you were drunk so fair is fair"

Ewwww, she had slept with this guy. Maybe what was said about her behind her back was true, maybe she did have really low standards and it seemed that after the next statement the man made, they had reached an all time low.

"I must say" he said, "I like you better when you're naked"

The nerve of this guy!

"Gwet OWT!" Marcia yelled

This time he took the hint that if he wanted to still have a face then he'd better move, fast. When he was finally out Marcia sighed. Now onto the next problem, the puncture in her tongue.

**********************************************************************************

Septimus set off for the Wizard Tower at 11:30, after saying a reluctant goodbye to Jenna at the door he began to ascend to the top of the Tower where he expected to find Marcia working in her study or reading in the Library. He opened the door to the apartment.

"Marcia", he called "I'm back"

He waited for a reply, when none came he began to climb the stairs.

"Marcia, are you here?"

Afterwards he thought that this was a silly question, as if Marcia wasn't here then she would hardly answer him.

"Sweptimus?" Marcia called from the kitchen

"Marcia?" Septimus replied, Marcia sounded odd. Like she had a lisp or something.

"Ywes, in hwere" sighed Marcia

Septimus walked into the kitchen, Marcia was sat at the table in one hand she had a cup of coffee and in the other tissue covered in... Septimus' stomach lurched, blood.

"Marcia, w-what h-happened last n-night" he stammered

In answer Marcia simply stuck her tongue out at him, Septimus stared open mouthed.

"Y-your tongue?" he asked

"Ywes, lwavst nwight I gwot mwvy twongwue pwieseb" said Marcia irritably

"What?" said Septimus

Marcia grabbed a piece of paper from a draw and began to write:

_**Unfortunately, I got slightly drunk last night and under the influence of alcohol consented to getting my tongue pierced.**_

"Oh" said Septimus; well he thought I guess it could have been worse. He was reminded slightly of the time that Marcia had got a tattoo on her back, she had been complaining for days afterwards.

"Right, I guess now would not be a good time to mention that my dad's coming over in about..." Septimus consulted his watch, "half an hour"

"Wvhadt" exclaimed Marcia

Great she thought, Silas already thinks I'm irresponsible enough as it is, oh well. I've got half an hour.

Just then the sound of fist on wood as someone knocked on the door was heard.

Oh crap, thought Marcia. __

**Thx guys for reading, and thank you to all you people who reviewed it is much appreciated. Hope you guys don't mind that Marcia is acting really irresponsibly because it's going to get worse. I'll try and get chapter 4 up as soon as I can and also please review. **

**Bella **


	4. Chapter 4

**Yey chapter 4! Thank you to all you people who reviewed it means a lot that you like my writing. Anyway hope you like this chapter.**

**I am not!**

"Hello?" called a familiar voice, "Septimus? Marcia? Answer the bloody door!"

"Um, I'll get that" said Septimus hurriedly leaving the room as Marcia desperately started to practice speaking without a lisp. Septimus hurried down the stairs to the door and threw it open.

"Hey dad" Septimus sighed

"Did you talk to Marcia about me borrowing the books?" asked Silas

Something in his voice told Septimus that he had hoped he hadn't, Silas liked annoying Marcia.

"Um, no I haven't" Septimus said

"Right then, I'd better tell her now" smirked Silas

"She's not here" said Septimus, a little too quickly

"Oh, alright. I'll just take them"

As they began to ascend the stairs to the library they heard a crash from downstairs.

"What was that?" exclaimed Silas, startled

"I... um... well..." Septimus began, but he knew it was no use

"I thought you said Marcia wasn't here", said Silas accusingly

"Yeah... um... about that"

"Blwoodvy twable" cried Marcia

"Hmmm," said Silas, and set off towards the kitchen before Septimus had a chance to stop him.

Silas entered the kitchen to find Marcia nursing her foot and cursing under her breath.

"Well" said Septimus lamely, "she's back"

"Hello" said Marcia, looking slightly embarrassed, "Hey I can talk again!"

"You never seemed to have any problem talking before", grumbled Silas, still unaware of Marcia's temporary speech impediment.

"I know only recent events... well..." instead of explaining it to Silas she simply stuck out her tongue

"Oh my god Marcia, how drunk were you when you got that done!" exclaimed Silas

"Last night: Got drunk, got tongue pierced, collapsed on floor" Marcia replied, deciding to leave out the part about the random naked people and the man that claimed to have slept with her.

"You are still unbelievably irresponsible! I would have thought at some point you would grow up and act your age" retorted Silas, "Actually makes sense I suppose, why bother to break the habit of a life time"

"No no, it gets better!" said Marcia happily, "Do you remember Amy LeGrende?"

"No", snorted Silas

"Well we met at a party and..." Marcia began

"Got drunk" Silas interjected

"Yes but that's beside the point, anyway as I was saying before you rudely interrupted" she glared at him as she said it, "Amy I have decided that as we are getting older..."

"You'll get married if you haven't found a husband by the time you're 50?" Silas asked

"No, I'm not a lesbian" said Marcia and then continued, "As we are getting older we have decided that when we become menopausal..."

Silas snorted

"We will see if we can grow beards!" finished Marcia

"Marcia" said Silas, "When do you draw the line? Is there even a line?"

"Don't be ridiculous Marcia", stated Septimus "You're a woman can't grow a beard. Can you?"

"I can do anything I want to!" said Marcia outraged, "And when I do become menopausal I won't take hormone replacement and I will grow a beard! So there!"

"Marcia why do you want a beard anyway?" asked Silas

"I don't" said Marcia, "Nasty things to get food stuck in"

"Then why are you going to grow one?" questioned Silas

"Just to prove that I can" said Marcia

"Beards and women, women and beards. It's not really right" said Septimus

"Yeah", agreed Silas "its like if a women wanted to be..."

"If a woman wanted to be what?" Marcia asked accusingly

"Um... King?" said Silas lamely

"No seriously, what were you going to say?" Said Marcia, anger evident in her voice

"I've got one!" chimed in Septimus, "I know what a woman can't be"

"What?!" Silas and Marcia asked in unison

"A penis model!" said Septimus

"Good point" said Marcia

Silas put his head in his hands, "Look. A few years with you and you've stolen his innocent mind!"

"No she hasn't" said Septimus loyally, "Marcia had some guests round and I asked one what his job was and he told me that..."

"Enough" interrupted Silas, "Maybe the local schools should hire Marcia to give lessons in Sex Education"

"I am not a whore" said Marcia crossly

"Yes you are" said Silas

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"I am so not"

"Yes sorry you aren't!" said Silas angrily, "I forget that some of these men pay you!"

"I AM NOT A PROSTITUTE!" yelled Marcia

"Um... can I say something?" asked Septimus

"NO!" shouted Silas and Marcia

Just then a knock at the door interrupted their argument.

**Thx for reading! I know that it's a very short chapter and I'm sorry that I haven't updated in a while but the summer hols are here soon! YAY! Then I should be able to write much longer chapters and update more regularly! Also I would like to thank Friends for the line about what a woman can do thing, I just felt the need to add it in. So please read and review!**

**Bella**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello! Me and some mates have gone on holiday I wrote this chapter in Tenerife! It is really great here and I'm getting a tan! I've got Extras on in the background because Nina loves it so in the bits that she writes she is probably gonna put in some phrases from it. Also sorry I haven't posted in ages, if your reading this then I'm back home now and I couldn't post in Tenerife because even though I had my laptop there wasn't any internet connection!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Septimus Heap!**

**Anyway this is a nice long chapter! Well enjoy!**

**Immature **

"Shame Sep can't come over more often", sighed Jenna

"Well I suppose he's busy", replied Sarah absentmindedly

"Right, yeah I guess", said Jenna

Just then a door opened on the left hand side of the chamber.

"Good Morning Miss Jenna", said the woman who had just entered

"Morning Molly" replied Jenna

"I have your paper here Miss Sarah" said Molly

"Put it on the table" said Sarah

"Also you asked me to remind you that Miss Jillie Djinn from the Manuscriptorium is arriving at 12, to discuss the articles for the... oh... er... um... I..." stuttered Molly

"That's fine thank you Molly" replied Sarah

Molly put the paper down on the table and quickly exited the room.

Sarah sighed and picked the paper up off the table

"Oh My God!" cried Sarah, alarmed

"What!" said Jenna

"Go and get Molly to send a message to the Wizard Tower, I need Marcia here. Now!" replied Sarah

"What's this about?" asked Jenna bewildered

"I can't explain now, just do it!" Sarah exclaimed, "And send for Septimus as well and bring Silas back too"

Jenna quickly left the room and hurried to find Molly and get her to send a message to the Wizard Tower.

Sarah sank into a chair and picked up the paper again.

"What has she done" sighed Sarah

************************************************************************************************************

The knocking continued at the door, this time louder.

"Can we not get any peace to argue?" asked Marcia

"Erm... I'll get that" said Septimus quickly, in a hurry to leave the room

Septimus headed to the door, he took his time as he was in no hurry to return to the kitchen. He sighed when he reached the door then threw it open.

"Catchpole!" cried Septimus startled

"Yes... um... hello apprentice" said Catchpole awkwardly, "yours, Silas' and Madam Marcia's presence is requested at the Palace"

"Right" replied Septimus, and he shut the door and began to walk back to the kitchen

"Marcia" stated Septimus, "we're needed at the Palace and dad you need to come too"

"Now" replied Marcia

"Yeah, now"

"Right, then. We should off" said Marcia to Silas,

"Come on" said Septimus impatiently

Septimus, Marcia and Silas set off towards the Palace quickly

"So what happened last night?" asked Silas

"No much" said Marcia

"Sure, sure" said Silas

"Damn I should have gone to the toilet before we left, shouldn't I" stated Marcia

"Yeah, that would have been sensible"

There was an awkward silence

"I wonder why we're needed" mused Marcia

"Maybe someone's gotten locked in a room or something" replied Septimus sulkily

"I doubt that"

"Well I can't think what else it could be" snapped Septimus

"You're so moody at the moment"

"Huh. You're one to talk" retorted Septimus

"Excuse me? I will not allow you to talk to me like that" said Marcia angrily

"It's not a question of what you will allow. I'll do and say what I want"

"Not while our my apprentice", Marcia replied

"Hmph" said Septimus, staring at the floor

"Give him a break Marcia" said Silas

They walked in silence up Wizard Way, Marcia slightly in front.

"Oh no" said Marcia

"What" asked Silas

"There's Claudine Philips" replied Marcia

"Who?"

"Claudine Philips. You don't know her but I'm trying to avoid her"

"Can I ask why?"

"Because it's her birthday and she's having a drinks party"

"So?"

"Well she wants to invite me and she's always really nice and stuff"

"So why don't you want to go, I mean free drinks" said Silas

"But I don't really like her much"

"So why don't you tell her you don't want to be her friend"

"I can't do that" said Marcia shocked, "I mean that is so downing. I can't tell her that I fundamentally have a problem with her personality"

"Right, so what can you do?"

"The only honourable thing I can do, add her to the long list of people that I have to avoid for the rest of my life"

"Because that's sensible"

"Oh shit! Here she comes"

"Well make and excuse"

"Like what?"

"Well when I don't want to go to something I wait until they tell me when it is and then if it was a Saturday: Oh sorry this Saturday? I can't do this Saturday my brothers coming over. And that way I wanted to go but couldn't" replied Silas

"That's actually quite good, oh no here she comes"

"Hello Marcia!" exclaimed Claudine

"Hi" replied Marcia

"Now it's my birthday this Friday, I'm twenty one again! Now I'm having a drinks party and no excuses I want you to come" said Claudine

"Oh, this Friday? My brother's coming over" said Marcia, sounding convincingly sad

"Oh well bring him along I'd love to meet him" replied Claudine

"Oh...er... ok" said Marcia

"Bye!" said Claudine, and she walked away

"Great" sighed Marcia, "Brilliant, bloody brilliant"

"Well it could be worse, you could..." began Silas

"Oh wow look at that guy over there, he's so fit!" interrupted Marcia

"Why did you tell me that?" asked Silas

"Come on lets go say hi!"

"What...why?"

But Marcia had already gone. She quickly walked over to the other side of the street.

"Hi" said Marcia

"Oh hello" said the man

"I'm Marcia" replied Marcia

"I know"

"Right...yeah"

"Oh, I'm Max"

"So what are you doing?" asked Marcia

"I just buying food" replied Max

"Oh so what are you buying"

"I'm on high fibre diet, so just vegetable and spinach and things"

"Oh so no bowel cancer for you then"

"No hopefully not" replied Max nervously

There was silence for a moment

"Do you want to get a drink sometime?" asked Max

"Yeah sure, that'd be great!" replied Marcia

"Ok, I know where you live because of who you are so, I'll pick you up at seven" said Max

"Yeah ok" said Marcia, before hurrying back over to Silas

"So how'd that go?" asked Silas

"Good, I have a date" replied Marcia

"Now Marcia I know that you're a deeply shallow person and I just thought I might point out that he's got one leg shorter that the other" said Silas

"What?"

"Look see big shoe"

"Oh but they can do something about that can't they?" said Marcia

"Nope, if you've got a million crowns and go to the best doctor in the world all you'll come out with is a big shoe"

"I am not so shallow that I can't see past that"

"Yeah sure Marcia. Actually what's the rush? You don't have to make a decision tonight; you can sleep on it and make a decision in the morning"

"But he's coming over tonight!"

"Ahhh, you're screwed"

"Oh well, I'll go out with him tonight and prove I'm not shallow and then dump him" said Marcia

"Right, because that's not shallow" replied Silas

"No it not"

"What's the big deal about just telling him you don't want to go out with him?"

"No way! He's probably spent his whole life having shallow people ostracise him because of it! Then he'd think that I'm like that!"

"But you are like that!"

However Marcia wasn't listening, "Look there's, Layla and Ross"

"Who?" asked Septimus, after deciding that sulking wasn't getting him any attention.

"Marcia's friends. She may be a while, let's keep going, she'll catch up", replied Silas

Marcia hurried off across the road to where her friends where standing

"Hey Layla" called Marcia

A tall blonde woman turned at the mention of her name

"Hey M" replied Layla

"How'd the date last night go?" asked Marcia

"Little bit of advice if you get the most gorgeous black man back at your place, don't leave your golliwog lying around. And even worse don't let him catch you trying to hide it", stated Layla

"Oh", was all Marcia could say

The man standing next to Layla turned round; he was very tall and muscular with mousy hair.

"And your date Ross?" Marcia asked the man

"Oh...um... the date. Let me go over some of the highlights for you. I lied to a priest in front of a room full of Christians, some of them proudly some just weird and bewildered. So insulted them and their belief system. Made a woman hate me for the rest of her life, didn't believe in god before so I'm defiantly going to hell" replied Ross in and exasperated tone, "I liked her as well"

"Ahhh" said Marcia, "Shame. But don't worry I know someone who'd be perfect for you and she's desperate. And she has a real problem hanging on to men because she's clinically depressed"

"Oh great have you got her number?"

"Yeah I do actually"

"No, no. I was being sarcastic, because I don't want to go out with a mental psychopath"

"Oh you mean Marie! She's really nice underneath" said Layla

"Oh and she just cuts you when she forgets to take her lithium" replied Ross

"Hey there's Nigel", exclaimed Layla "Hey Nigel!"

The man on the side of the road turned around, noticed them and began walking over.

"Hello Nigel, how's Becka?" asked Layla

"She dumped me" said the man named Nigel dejectedly, "I just don't understand why I can't keep a girlfriend, that's the fourth girl that's dumped me in the last three months. Why can't I get a good girlfriend?"

"Oh, actually I had been thinking about this", said Marcia "and I've got a feeling that it could be your shape... I mean it is a very unusual shape and I'm just not sure what girl would be looking for it. Could you maybe do a little bit more exercise?"

"Yeah, that might help" interjected Layla

"Well, I mean we can banter all we like" replied Marcia, "but if you insist on remaining... well... a blob. Could you at least get a tan?"

"So girls are looking for a fat bloke with a tan are they? Thanks Marcia, for nothing" said Nigel grumpily and he walked off

"I was just being honest!" said Marcia, "anyway sorry got to go; I'm need at the Palace"

"See ya M" called Layla after Marcia had began walking away

"Bye" replied Marcia

"If you see any fit guys: T and T!"

"I know!"

"What the hell is 'T and T'?" asked Ross

"Tits and Teeth" said Layla, "if you see a guy you like push your boobs out and smile"

"You girls are so weird"

**********************************************************************************************************

Marcia ran up Wizard Way and up to the Palace, she hurried through the corridors and came to a halt outside a room when she heard her name mentioned. She pressed her ear against the door.

"I mean how could she be so irresponsible!"

"I'm sure that she can explain herself"

"What the hell was she doing?"

Marcia sighed; I'd better see what there cross about and she pushed open the door. The room fell silent as she entered.

"Where are Septimus and Jenna?"

"We wanted to talk to you first" said Sarah coldly

"Well what do you want to talk to me about?"

"I don't appreciate my son's teacher acting like a pissed up slapper"

"What!"

For and answer Sarah picked up the paper and brandished it in Marcia's face.

"Oh my god" whispered Marcia

**Yay! Cliffy! Hopefully I'll update soon but I dunno, I was planning to write loads of chapters whilst in Tenerife but... I didn't. Nina was meant to write this chapter but she didn't so I had to. She's now writing chapter six and Alex (thats my bf) I've got him writing chapter seven! He is not happy about it! Lol!**

**Please review and tell me what you think and make any sort of suggestions for plot stuff or anything because this did have a plot line at the beginning but I've messed it up soooo badly so please if you have any ideas please mail me and stop me from writing another chapter about not much! Ok Bye!**

**Bella**


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